It can happen right???

So here is the photo that motivates me to put down the cashews, grilled cheese crusts from my kid's sandwiches, and fritoes. Not a bad goal right (to look like Christina Ricci in this photo)? A friend of mine believes in starvation. I believe in eating less and exercising. All the celebrities say that they keep fit by finding quiet time for themselves or focusing in on the positive or playing with their 2 year old in the park. I call bull $&*@ on that. The celebrities keep fit by firing their chefs if they allow doughnuts or potato chips to cross their thresholds.

So I can't afford a trainer and I have no chef/"food bouncer" at my door. Hmmm... wish me luck. I am going to try chanting in the backyard in a criss-cross apple sauce position while my kids run circles around me. Or maybe I should just tie my hands behind my back. No more typing today......

What's Best/What's Easiest

Top Ten Best/Easiest List for March 30, 2009 (note: this is just for today)

Let me set this day up for you. Today is the first day of spring break for my children (and me) Hooray. No carpool! So here is my list- (Best will be listed first. Easiest second)

1. Eggs and toast/pop tarts

2. Reading E.B. White's Stuart Little to the kids at bedtime/Reading Sponge Bob's "Show me the Bunny".

3. making whole wheat bread, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch/defrosting the Uncrustable frozen sandwich

4. calling the soccer families to tell them that my hubby is not coaching this weekend/emailing them (chickening out)

5. blow drying my hair for the first time in 5 days/another day with the hair clip

6. playing educational games with the kids/kids plugged into the television or wii

7. being the pitcher for my fellas/magazine reading by the play set

8. leaving the laundry for another day/leaving the laundry for another day (of course this is just my opinion)

9. vacuuming/swiffering

10. talking to friends about my life/talking to friends about everyone else's life

So I am not saying that I am taking the easy road today. And if I did everything on the "best list" it would be my best mom/wife day ever. But the way I see it folks is that it's all about balance. I think I will be the pitcher and read a little E.B. White at story time after I avoid the laundry and swiffer.

Why can't people be more direct??

Today I have been getting 20 emails in my inbox from my neighbors. (Email is a great way for everyone living here to share news and information about what is going on in our little section of town.) It has been a reply to all kind of morning. The most recent gripe has been about people not picking up after their dogs.

Before I continue, let me paint a picture of my neighborhood for you. Our "hood" (as we like to call it) is shaped like a lollipop. You drive in on the stick and either turn right or left around the candy/circle. Sidewalks line the streets. The oldest house here was built in the 1800's. We have houses on the Macon historic registry. We have a house or two built in the 60's. Some homes have less than 1500 square feet and some with 6,000+. It goes from cottages to mansions here. There are 50 altogether.

We have a reputation for being a very fun, close knit neighborhood. We have an annual 4th of July party, spring party and Christmas party. Our kids play football and frisbee in the street. We borrow eggs from each other. We meet once a month to discuss issues ranging from what color to paint the historic street lamps to finding a date for the Easter egg hunt. We also meet once a month over a keg of beer. The weekly "cocktail cruise" usually starts about 5:15 on Friday afternoon. Parents cruise (walk) with their styrofoam cups behind their children's big wheels, scooters or tricycles. It's just that kind of neighborhood. Wide streets. Long afternoons with people talking over their fences.

So when the dog poop conversation comes up everyone wants to throw in their two cents. (By all means we need to keep this neighborhood sparkling white!) except for the guilty parties (they, of course, are silent). But if no one ever names names we are going to be right back where we started in a month or so. The guilty will continue to leave their crap behind. The rest of us will continue to endure the vast amount of emails.

Why can't people be more direct????

I only post this because I am a very direct person. If someone is doing something that is hurtful or annoying I tell it like it is. Of course I am polite but direct. I use my "feeling" words.

Let's all try it out... "I feel ___________ when ___________. Next time please______."

pause... pause.... pause...

Now my turn:
"'B' (no need to name names here on my blog), I feel frustrated when I have to pick up a pound of dog poop that has been deposited by your 150 pound Labrador. Would you please use a grocery bag to pick up after 'S' on your next walk?"

Wouldn't this be much better than 50 people getting bothered by 50 emails that do not pertain to them whatsoever because of one or two neighbor's irresponsibility?

I did not send out the original "poop" email this morning so I am not going to be direct on this one. I have a dog. I pick up after her if she is out of our yard. If there is a little extra poop in our yard from a neighbor's dog, no biggie. But what I don't want is a vast amount of emails smothering my inbox over something that doesn't pertain to me because someone is not going directly to the source of the problem.

So, people- use your feeling words!!!! Here are some more examples:

"Honey, I feel disgusted when I sit on the toilet with the toilet seat is up. There are times when I have fallen in and that adds to my aggravation. Please put the toilet seat down." (This does not happen in our house, thank heavens.)

OR-

"Sweety, I feel unappreciated when you do not notice that all the laundry is put away when you know it is my least favorite thing IN THE WORLD to do. Please just give me a bit of acknowledgement for this task." (This also does not occur in my house because the laundry never gets put away.)

See how easy that is? You say how you feel and the other person sympathises with your feelings. Do not point the finger. Do not use the word "you" (as in "you leave the toilet seat up"). That immediately puts the other person on the defensive.

Go for it! It works!

Top ten things I would rather be doing than the laundry

1. cleaning the toilet
2. cleaning your toilet
3. getting a bikini wax
4. bathing suit shopping (if you read my last post you will know that right now this is not at the top of my list of favorite things to do- but it is STILL BETTER than laundry.
5. watching the Tyra Banks show (this may not make the list- I might like doing the laundry better)
6. the stairmaster
7. visiting my obgyn
8. swimming in seaweed
9. watching Nascar on television
10. having a mole removed

What would it be like if I had girls? All my friends who do, my heart goes out to you!

Swim suit season is approaching...

This is not a weight loss blog but it is a blog about me. I started blogging to keep the creative juices flowing for my writing. But lately all I have been thinking about is swim suit season which coincides with my 20 year high school reunion. So, I have put a poll on my blog asking you how much weight you would like to lose if you were going to Florida for a reunion. That way if you say, "Oh Betsy you don't need to lose weight." I can say, "Look at my poll. Most everyone wants to lose weight."

I am so far from my goal. I would post my current weight and my goal but I know it is human nature for your friends/blog followers to say nice things. But you know what? Nice comments on my current weight are not going to keep me from the white powdered doughnuts that my kids love to eat on the weekends! So don't be nice!

I want to post a picture of me on the beach from two summers ago when I was at my GOAL weight (after a bout with the stomach bug- I might add.) That way every time I look at my blog I will see that photo and be reminded of where I want to be.

I did strategically place that same photo in my pantry. I think I need to make it an 8 1/2 by 11. I keep looking around it to find the corn chips. (Just tossed the corn chips in the trash. Sorry to anyone who thinks I should be feeding the world with those corn chips. By the time they made it to Africa, they would have been stale.)

I am weighing in tomorrow. If you don't feel like reading about weight, exercise or food just skip over it and read my other posts. This is really just for me. If I post my weight weekly I will feel like I am answering to someone besides myself.

When Does It End?

Last night watching television I saw three young, adult men hanging out with each other just talking. They were brothers. I turned to Jason and said, "Let's have another child." He looked at me with this "Whatcha talkin' 'bout Willis" look. I explained to him that it would be really cool to give Andrew and Patrick another brother (or sister to look after) to play with and have as a friend/sibling when they are older. Well, Jason didn't think that having another baby was a good idea. I agreed with him- especially during these economic times but it sure would be awesome.

Last week I looked out the kitchen window and saw the boys on the swings. My oldest was swinging so high. My youngest was sitting there with a huge frown on his face, very still. I knew he wanted to be pushed but he needed to come and ask me. So I waited. He never came. The next time I looked out there Andrew (7) was pushing Patrick (4) as high as he would go. Patrick was in full, head-back laughter. I loved watching them.

Then yesterday the boys were working together to clean up their blocks. Patrick turns to Andrew and says, "Andrew, are you my best friend?" Andrew responded, "Yes. I am your best friend." Patrick said, "Well, what about David." Andrew- "No, not David. You are my best friend Patrick." Does it get any better than that?

These are the moments that I say to myself, "Maybe just one more." I could deal with the bottles, pacifiers and plastic stuff all over the house again. I could deal with the late nights, the car seat, the stroller...I guess I just don't want these moments to slip away. I worry that there won't be more of the same to follow.

I bet three is great. I bet four is great. Five... not so sure. But two is AWESOME. Especially my two. Andrew is always loving and making sure everyone feels good and is happy. Patrick is choosy with his affection. He doles it out during unexpected times.

I'm going to sit tight (see picture above) with what I have - two very happy, healthy boys. Every day they bring something new to the table- a challenge, an idea, a brilliant thought.

So when does it end? When do I stop wanting more? Perhaps the idea of having more children will always be in the back of my head.
I guess I need to just look at this picture and remind myself of the happiness that I felt at that moment (and so many other moments). There is just so much love that it fills me up.

Motherhood has been the most wonderful experience of my entire life- nothing tops it. So there are times when I want to start from scratch and do it all over again. But for right now I am going to savor this time with my little guys and give them as much of me as possible.

If I post another blog on this topic will you just comment back- "Potty training!!!!!"

Vacation Can't Come Soon Enough

It's mid-March and I am already thinking about vacation. And when I say vacation I mean a trip to the beach. Going to the beach is the ultimate vacation to me. I don't feel like there is an agenda to follow or a place that I have to go. There is the sand, the water, the sun. It doesn't matter if I am on the porch of the balcony looking out, sitting directly on the beach or just listening to the waves from the couch- it's all good.

The laundry can wait. We can snack at 5:00 and I don't worry about spoiling our dinner. If the kids want to stay up late- go for it. That is what the beach is for me- no schedules, no constraints, no have-tos.

I tried to change this picture of me and the boys to a picture of just the beach and water but my computer is not agreeing with me this morning. Oh well. This photo sums it all up for me just fine- Look at the smile on my face. It just doesn't get any wider than that.

87 more days 'til we leave for Florida but who's counting!!!!????!!!

Andrew was four when this picture was taken. Tomorrow he will be seven. Where has the time gone? He's like a balloon that has just been released. Of course he's moving away from me at a much slower pace but a mother never gets that time back. You and your balloon. Me and my baby. But I have released my sweet balloon. He needs to float on his own. He can play 50 feet away from me now instead of 2. The dangers used to be the corner of the coffee table or whatever he could get into under the kitchen sink. Now I worry about who he plays with at school and if he is sitting still long enough to listen to the directions from the teacher.

What a sweet, sweet boy he is. He has the kindest spirit of any child I have ever known.

I'll let you in on a little secret. I tied a string on that balloon that is forever long. I am never letting go!

Thank you Antoinette Portis

Is this legal? I love Skippyjon. I had to have a picture for my blog.

Check her out!

My buddy Shelli is having a contest on her blog. She is giving away a hamster. Ok, maybe not a hamster but some other prize (it's SUPER GREAT but shhhhhh!). I am not that excited to share that on my blog just because I don't need anymore competition out there. So if you go to the link below feel free to enter the contest but don't even dream of competing with me. Ha, ha, ha, ha, HA!

http://faeriality.blogspot.com

Where in the World is...

I don't know what got me thinking of Matt Lauer's segment he does every year "Where in the World is Matt Lauer" last night. Wherever that thought came from it does not matter. But I thought it would be a good title for my blog this a.m. because there are some things missing in my life/in the world and I don't know where in the world they are...

Where in the World is...

1. Tom Selleck? He is a little old for me but I love him just the same. I used to stay up late at night secretly (secretively?) in high school to watch him until about 11:30 p.m. On Thursdays his show was on 4 times! Loved him on Friends. Thank heavens he grew his mustache back. I don't like facial hair but I love it on Tom.

2. my bikini? Ok. I know it's hiding in a drawer somewhere. But this warm weather coming up is reminding me that I have to be in a bathing suit sometime in the near future. Ug- the horror!

3. my patience? Do you ever want to honk at the car in front of you to signal them to honk at the car in front of them because the lead car's driver in the LONG line of cars is the oldest person in your town and is driving 15 miles under the speed limit?

4. my motivation to exercise? I hurt myself training for a marathon. I am on strict orders from the doctor to "rest" but that does not mean to be completely dormant! I tried that ridiculous exercise bike. I didn't last but 20 minutes.

5. my son's Leapster?

6. my fashion sense? I was seen in the Rite Aide this morning with stretchy work out pants, a fleece pullover and snow boots. Thank heavens I slipped the paparazzi at the corner of Vineville and Pierce.

7. Britney Spears' talent? Well, we all know she never had any but come on! Why isn't anyone talking about her lip syncing? EVERY song sounds different. Are there any other "artists" out there like this?

8. Jennifer Wingertzahn? Clarion books. Where are you? I would love to hear something back! Ok. I spelled your last name with an "a" instead of an "e". I am so sorry. It was my first submission ever! I was nervous.

9. the perfect house? One that cleans up after itself or is allergic to clutter (wow- we wouldn't live here long!)

10. is/has the time gone? Off to pick up the P-man (see photo above of my angel)

The Great Catch

Poor fishy! He's a goner for sure. Look at the proud looks on these two guy's faces. He's either going to be eaten or mounted. There's just no hope for him now!

This is the inspiration for my next picture book- right here!

Norman Rockwell has nothing over the Delves family. Tonight's story hour looked like one of his paintings. Daddy asleep on the bed while the kids are propped up on his belly struggling to see the pictures of the book I was reading to them.

We love Skippyjon Jones!

Life is good.

25 Things about me!

1. I write for children.
2. Laundry- I don't mind washing or folding but I HATE putting it away.
3. I love to cook and make fancy meals but my kids only like the same five things for dinner.
4. I scrapbook in my spare time. I use all my spare money on scrapbooking supplies.I have a whole room dedicated to my scrapbooking habit.
4. My Dad is my hero.
5. When I am mad about something I call my mom.
6. I am a former teacher but despise doing homework with my 1st grader.
7. I read magazines and catalogs back to front.
8. I love to buy picture books, especially hardcover. I have over 500 in my own library.
9.I would rather be in the woods or on the beach with my boys and husband than any other place on the weekends.
10.I find inspiration for my writing by watching and playing with my boys.
11.My husband is the funniest person I know.(and most loving- but tries to hide it to others).
12. I cry at the simplest things but my friends would not label me emotional.
13.I love GALAGA.
14.I once stayed up until 6:40 a.m.(started at 10:00 the night before) watching past episodes of LOST to catch up to this season premiere. I am such a LOST junkie!
15.I love to play tennis.
16.I love to read!!!! I have a list of at least 40 books right now that I am dying to get to- picture books, young adult, adult....
17.Biggest bummer- trained for the Jan. '09 Disney marathon and was injured 3 weeks before the race.
18.My sister in law is like a real sister to me.
19.I am not AS scared of frogs as I once was.
20.My first purchase after winning the lottery would be a beach home.
21.If I had to choose one thing or two things to grab before my house burned down (outside of family/pets), it would be my scrapbooks/photos and my book ideas folder.
22.I am a founding sister of the Alpha Xi Delta sorority at Florida Atlantic University. Go AZD!!!
23.My husband and I drove through a tornado on the highway.(I said my goodbyes to him.That bad!)
24.I wish one more of Jason's fraternity brothers would get married soon so that I can see all of them and their wives again! Braden... (Who is going to the Duke reunion this Spring?)
25.Sting could be the only artist on my ipod and I wouldn't care.

Sandbars

First blog- ever....

Where the sandbar ends....Not here in Macon, Georgia but out there, somewhere. Where the sandbar ends is the perfect name for my blog because when I write I want to be in a place of endless possibilities. That could be anywhere, a sandbar, at the bottom of a mountain (or the top) or in front of a computer screen.

Sandbars are always moving and changing shape. Just like my writing. Isn't it fun to swim out to a sandbar and just look around? You feel such a sense of accomplishment when you get there. Writing does this for me. I like to swim out to a place I have never been before, find my footing, look around and stay awhile. Perhaps accomplish something. Maybe not. It's all in the journey and how you perceive it.

I love writing for children. I imagine children (of all ages) out on my sandbar having a blast or just taking it all in.

I am so excited to be here!